Art of Communication

Let's start out with the most IMPORTANT basic foundation when it comes to a kink lifestyle or well any form of relationship really.

I'm going to say this loudly for those in the back.... Communication is important.

And no, text messages aren't included in this because honestly they can be misinterpreted in so many levels. I quite literally reread my messages and am like well that sounds bitchy or just like somethings wrong. When I'm perfectly happy.

Like communication, TRANSPARENCY in its most simplistic form is very important. Tell your sub/ dom things without being asked, be open with your dom/sub - It's okay to feel and express those feelings. It's okay to over share - You should feel safe enough to be vulnerable with your partner without feeling scared - because well TRUST is also key.

Check ins are vital - play date or non play dates. It's so important to just see how your dom/sub is feeling. For me personally, I try to offer help: massages, cleaning, cooking. I like to feel useful, needed, desired, cherished in my dynamic.

Your dom / sub is not a mind reader : talking and expressing are the only way your dynamic can grow and be the very best dynamic it can be. Sometimes I think we forget that, that we just assume the other person will know exactly what we want or feel when it can be absolutely wrong.

Don't even get me started on CONSISTENCY because even if you communicate and are transparent... without the consistency of said communication... then it just leaves questions, on top of questions and so much more concerns.

So my challenge for you is to talk, express yourself, be transparent, and communicate with your dom/sub in anyway you see fit. Phone calls and in person are best because you actually get the lay out of their mood better than any message.

Give yourself some grace - everyone has off days. everyone overthinks.

Breathe and share.